Let Go!

I need that. To let go...of the memories..of the pain..of his face that haunts my dreams. I need to let go. Anybody knows how?
Nari

A wish list!

There're places I wanna go and people that I wanna meet.. I want to discover cultures. I want to grow. I want to pack my clothes and leave. I wanna breathe in Spain..eat pizza and walk around in Rome. I want to count stars in Hawaii. I want to shop in London and Paris. I want to go to South Africa. I want to help animals in Egypt. I wanna do good. I want to work and get sick of it. I want to run till my heart pounds in my ears. I want to feel alive. Laugh so hard that I cry. I want to meet Becks and hug her. I'm 21, beautiful and I have a whole life to live. Love life and live it. Appreciate life
No one gonna take that from me!
Hopeful!

Bittersweet symphony, this life

Well I never pray

But tonight I'm on my knees yeah

I need to hear some sounds that recognize the pain in me, yeah

I let the melody shine, let it cleanse my mind, I feel free now

But the airways are clean and there's nobody singing to me now
The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony..

Please remember!

That I've never loved anyone as much.
Nari

Dear Journal,

I miss him. Yes, I admit it. I don't wanna things to turn back like they used to be. I don't want him back. I just miss him. His smell, his smile, his voice. Everything. I truly loved him, very deeply so. I lost my faith and trust in him. I used to think that he was my hero. My guy I called him in my head, My Migo to his face. I miss the sound of my name on his lips when I answer the phone. I miss his touch. I miss laughing with him. He doesn't deserve a second chance. He didn't even try to get one! He was never sorry for my misery and pain. He probably never will be. I could have given him the world, my life, I could have given him me. I could have loved him all my life and never waited for something back. I called him 7ayaty. He was 7abibi. My first. My one and only. He didn't want that. He betrayed me and humiliated me. And how could anyone put up with that? Why am I crying rightnow? It's no longer a relief..it's a constant pain in my heart. My eyes burn. Where did he go? Why did I fell in love with him? Where did I go wrong? I feel sorry for myself. But that won't help me. I never sought solace in him. He was always the cause of my pain. He never comforted me. It was an illusion and it's over now. So tired all the time. I miss him so much. I want one more hug, one more kiss on the forehead, or my cheek. I would accept a one on the hand. Why did this happen? Who's gonna be mine if it isn't him? I'm better off without him but there's always a but. But I'll miss him.
..يا رب عوضنى خيرا

Nariman.

2nd of May!

On Forgiving!

I will never be able to forget the pain of being hurt by the people who were close to me but at the same time I can proudly say that I have moved on. I have forgiven them, not because I still care about them but because I love myself. I love myself far too much to let the same incident hurt me again and again.
Having said that, I also fear that I might end up building walls around me and not trusting anyone for the fear of getting hurt. I know I do that quite often and wonder if I’m doing the right thing. Where do you draw the line between maintaing your dignity and not being a cold, self-centered person?
Yes, I believe everyone deserves a second chance but I don’t think I can give the same person another chance to hurt me. I would never go out and seek revenge (I leave that to Karma) but I would never ever want things to go back to how they used to be. I don’t hold grudges and let it affect my life but I don’t forget either!